elton john has kicked billy joel to the curb and replaced him with hillary clinton.
tickets for the april 9th radio city concert "elton and hillary: one night only" go on sale this wednesday at 9 a.m. edt. second tier prices start at $125 for mezzanine seats and $250 for seats near the orchestra. (premium seats will go for $500, $1000, and $2300.)
"i'm not a politician but i believe in the work that hillary clinton does," elton said, right before he bitch-slapped chelsea clinton for wearing the same versace pantsuit he had on, and looking better in it. "i'm not a singer," said hillary clinton, "but candle in the wind is my karaoke jam!"
a set list leaked to the press includes a guest appearance by bill clinton singing rocket man, hillary singing a new "iraq war vote" version of sorry seems to be the hardest word, a bill/hillary duet on don't go breakin' my heart and a special hillary "long-distance dedication" to the states of ohio and texas -- someone saved my life tonight.
no word yet whether elton will ask senator clinton to join him singing (say it with me) the bitch is back!